I'm super stressed out...

Last night I just got Angel and N'drea out from Mount Pleasant Animal Hosiptal... they have been vomitting and having gastric and worse of all.. having diarrhoea for 2 days... and I was freaking out so much I rushed them to the hospital on 29th September 2006... there was even blood traces in their diarrhoea... was so worried that they might die... and thank God they are fine now... the vet placed them on drip and they were whining and OMG.. I teared so much that night I was way over the speed limit while trying to rush them to the hospital... I HATE it when people who PRETEND they care simply brush me off when my dogs are so ill... If you cared enough you wouldn't just scream at me and tell me that the dogs would be fine... FINE your HEAD!!!! If they are dead, I'll Kill you I swear!!! (hahaha just remembered one of jeremy's fave quotes...)

Anyway, they are fine now... and on 30th my maid didn't return, she decided not to come back... and I decided my new maid Mariam is not bad either so I'll not be getting a permanent help anymore... I cannot bear to re-train another person... its tedious, taxing and most importantly it FREAKS ME OUT... anywayz, Mariam does a great job of the cleaning and even handling the dogs... she got used to it... she is dedicated to the dogs too... in fact when they were ill, she was worrried for them too... I'm so touched by her efforts...

Abit depressed now... things don't seem to be going right... and I think for now, I need a break from work and a break from people... I shall just be in recluse for the moment... Need some peace and solutide from the crazy fanatic real world... so people if I avoid your calls its cos I am hiding in my cave seeking for some peace...

DON'T COME AND USE THE WORDS: "Orh so christian also like this one la... church teach this that the other one la..." EH!! Christians are humans too made of flesh and blood, we try our best to control and be nice and do right things but we get angry too... we have feelings too... we are afterall humans!!! So stop putting the blame on the church we attend or the teachings of the bible... after all if I MADE A MISTAKE IT'S MY FAULT and no one else is supposed to be blamed for MY MISTAKES!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank You for sending me encouragements from all over... esp. this :

How God Sees You
Richard Roberts

When you look at your reflection in the mirror, you don't see the same thing that God sees. You see your exterior, but God sees your heart (I Samuel 16:7). That's how God saw Gideon when He found him cowering from the Midianites and chose him to be Israel's deliverer.

The angel of the Lord appeared to Gideon and said, "The Lord is with you, O valiant warrior" (Judges 6:12 NASB). Why would the angel call Gideon a mighty warrior? He was a frightened farmer, threshing wheat in a winepress-an unusual place-hoping the Midianites would not find him. But God did not see Gideon as weak and fearful. The Lord looked at him and said, "Go in this your strength and deliver Israel from the hand of Midian" (v. 14). Suddenly Gideon recognized that he had strength he didn't know he had, and he was able to subdue the Midianites.

You, too, have strength from God that you don't know you have! The same strength that God put inside Gideon He has put inside you. You are strengthened with might trough His Spirit in the inner man (Ephesians 3:16 NKJV). God operates in the supernatural realm, and He doesn't see you the way natural eyes do. He sees your potential! Just as He told Gideon, "Go in this your strength," that's what He wants you to do also.

God doesn't see you as weak, ineffective, or fearful. He sees you as you can be because He's given you the strength to become just that. He sees you the way He created you, and He wants you to see yourself that way, too, through the eyes of faith. When you see yourself the way God sees you, you can conquer life's battles!